I was thinking about how crazy it is that I am who I am where I am. Me, a short girl, living in little New Zealand. I could be born anywhere. I could’ve been born Russian, Mexican, or Thai. But no I’m born kiwi. I could be living anywhere: Iceland, Canada, Singapore, but no, I’m living in New Zealand. There’s millions of possibilities of things I could’ve been. But I’m not. And I can’t help but think there’s a reason for that. There’s a reason I wasn’t born a baby in the slums of Jakarta, a reason I wasn’t born a rich kid living in LA. I am who I am, where I am for a reason. What about you? Why are you where you are? There’s a reason you are where you are. I want you to find your reason. I think one of the reasons we consider giving up our lives is because we loose our sense of purpose. We don’t think we’re significant at all. But there is significance in you. There’s significance in where you’re placed. There’s millions of people out there that could be you. But they’re not. You’re who you are, where you are for a reason. And yeah, life may suck, but don’t let it suck out all the purpose inside of you. You have so much purpose, so much significance. And I don’t want you to forget that. Because what’s the point of living if you’re nothing? There’s no point. Which is why you’re something. We’re all something. I know you still have that spark in you. You just need to find your purpose to light it up.
So you’re considering suicide, and that’s a big thing to be considering. But there’s something I’d beg you to do before it’s too late. Do something absolutely crazy. Something that absolutely terrifies you, but you know you’d love to do. If you decide after all to end your life, when you think really hard, will you find nothing but blank pages staring back at you of things you could’ve done, things you have yet to do. So do something crazy before its too late. Colour in those blank pages. Like one of my favourite quotes says “one day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.” Maybe you’ve always wanted to go on a roller coaster but haven’t because it seems scary, go do that. Do some thing that’s might have others saying “I didn’t think I’d ever see the day I’d see you do something like that.” Maybe you’ve always wanted to go overseas, go do that, or if you have no money, open up google maps and street view Paris, and pretend you’re on holiday, or just book a night in your local motel and act like a tourist. Do something crazy. Something that is not normal for you, but something that you’ve always wanted to do. And you know what? I’m going to join you on your crazy quest. I have always been terrified of boys. No jokes. In fact I had one tell me once, “I don’t bite.” Obviously, they don’t, but I’ve always been somewhat afraid of them anyway (hence my 20 year single status). Now, there’s this boy I like and well, I’ve decided to do something crazy seeing as Valentine’s Day is coming up. I’m actually for the first time ever going to message a guy I like and see what happens. So since I’m doing something crazy, so can you. Do some thing crazy before you even think about ending the life you have. There’s still so much living to be done, so do it before the last of the life you have leaks out of you.